# ■ 8 More adventures in Brobdingnag

Because I was so small，I had several dangerous acci-dents during my stay at the palace．One day Glumdal－clitch put me down on the grass in the palace garden，while she went for a walk with some of the Queen's ladies．A small white dog which belonged to one of the gardeners appeared， and seemed very interested in me．He took me in his mouth and carried me to his master，Luckily，he had been well trained，and did not try to bite me，so I was not hurt．

One day the Queen said to me，‘It would be good for your health to do some rowing or sailing．What do you think？Would you like me to arrange it for you？’

‘Madam，’I answered，I’d love to row or sail a little every day．But where can we find a boat that's small enough？’

‘Leave that to me，’she replied，and called for her work－men．She ordered them to make a tiny boat with sails．They also made a wooden container，about a hundred metres long，seventeen metres wide and three metres deep．This container was filled with water，and I was carefully placed in my boat on the water．Every day I used to row or sail there，while the Queen and her ladies watched．There was no wind，of course，but the ladies blew hard to move my boat along．

I nearly lost my life again，when a lady picked me up to put me in the boat She was not careful enough，and dropped me．With horror，I felt myself falling through the air．But instead of crashing to the ground，I was caught，by my trousers，on a pin in her clothes．I had to stay there without moving a finger，until Glumdalclitch came running to rescue me．

But the greatest danger to me in Brobdingnag came from a monkey．One day Glumdalclitch left me alone in her bedroom while she visited some of the ladies．It was a warm day，and her window was open．I was in the box which I used as my bedroom，with the door open．Suddenly I heard the noise of an animal jumping through the window，and immediately I hid at the back of my box．The monkey，which appeared huge to me，very soon discovered my hiding－place He picked me up，and held me close to him like a baby．When he heard someone opening the bedroom door，he jumped out of the window and ran on to the roof．

I thought I had never been in such great danger．He was running on three legs and holding me in the fourth．At any moment he could let me fall，and we were at least three hun-dred metres above the ground．I could hear a lot of shouting in the palace The servants had realized what was happening，and brought ladders to climb up on to the roof．Glumdalclitch was crying，and hundreds of people were watching from the garden Meanwhile，the monkey was sitting calmly on top of the roof．He was taking food from his mouth and trying to push it into my mouth．He still seemed to think I was his ba－by．I suppose it was an amusing sight for the crowd below，but I was in terrible fear of falling．

Finally，several servants climbed on the roof，and as they came nearer，the monkey put me down and ran away．I was rescued and brought down to the ground．I had to stay in bed for two weeks after this，before I felt well enough to meet peo－ple again．The monkey was caught and killed．

When I next saw the King，he asked me about this experi－ence．‘How did you feel，’he said，‘when the monkey was holding you up on the roof？’

‘Sir，’I replied bravely，‘I was afraid，that's true．But next time an animal like that attacks me，I shall not hesitate．I'll pull out my sword like this’-and I showed him what I would do－‘and give the creature such a wound that it will never come near me again！’

But while I waved my tiny sword in the air，the King and his lords laughed loudly．I had wanted to prove my bravery， but I failed，because to them I was only an unimportant little creature．I realized later that this often happens in England，when we laugh at someone of no family，fortune，or intelli-gence，who pretends to be as important as our great leaders．

In the next few weeks，I began to have some very interest－ing conversations with the King．He was an intelligent，un－derstanding person．

‘Tell me more about your country，’he said to me one day．‘I would like to hear about your laws，your political life，and your customs．Tell me everything．There may be something that we can usefully copy here in Brobdingnag．’

‘I shall be delighted， sir，’I answered proudly．‘Our king controls our three great countries，Scotland，Ireland and Eng－land．We grow much of our own food，and our weather is nei-ther too hot nor too cold．There are two groups Of men who make our laws．One is called the House of Lords－they are men from the oldest and greatest families in the country．The other is called the House of Commons－these are the most honest，intelligent，and sensible men in the country，and are freely chosen by the people．We have judges to decide punish－ments for criminals，and we have a large army，which cannot be defeated by any other in the world．’

While I was talking，the King was making notes．For sev－eral days I continued my explanation，and I also described British history over the last hundred years．Then the King asked me a large number of questions．These were some of them．

‘How do you teach and train young people of good family？If the last son of an old family dies，how do you make new lords for the House of Lords？Are these lords really the most suitable people to make the country's laws？And in the House of Commons，are these men really so honest and intelligent？Do rich men never buy their way into this House？You say the lawmakers receive no pay，but are you sure that they never ac-cept bribes？’

Then he asked questions about our lawcourts．‘Why are your trials so long and so expensive？How much do your lawyers and judges really know about the laws？How carefully do they decide between right and wrong？’

‘And why，’he went on，‘are you so often at war？Either you enjoy fighting，or you have very difficult neighbours！Why do you need an army at all？You would not be afraid of any other country，if you were peaceful people．And in the last hundred years you've done nothing but rob，fight，and mur-der！Your recent history shows the very worst effects of cruel－ ty，jealousy，dishonesty，and madness！’

I tried to answer the King as well as I could，but he did not think our system was a good one．

‘No，my little friend’he said kindly but seriously，‘I'm sorry for you．You've proved to me that your country has nothing valuable to offer us．Perhaps once，in the past，your political life was adequately organized，but now it is clear that there is laziness and selfishness in every part of the system．Your politicians can be bribed，your soldiers aren't really brave，your judges and lawyers are neither reasonable nor hon-est，and your lawmakers themselves know little and do less．I sincerely hope that you，who have spent most of your life trav-elling，have a better character than most Englishmen．But from what you've told me，I'm afraid that your countrymen are foe worst little nation of insects that has ever crawled upon the ground．’

I am very sorry to have to report these words of the King’ s，and I only do so because of my love of the truth．I must tell you exactly what happened，even if I do not agree with it．I had to listen patiently，while he was giving his extraordinary opinions of my dear country．We must remember，however，that this King lives in a country almost completely separate from the rest of the world．Because he does not know other countries systems or customs，he has a certain narrowness of thinking，which we Europeans do not have，of course.

You will find it difficult to believe what happened next．

‘Sir，’I said，‘I’d like to give you something to thank you for your kindness to me since I arrived at the palace．Three or four hundred years ago，we Europeans discovered how to make a special powder．When you set fire to it，it burns and ex-plodes immediately，with a noise louder than thunder．You can use it to shoot heavy balls of metal from large guns．It can destroy the largest ships，it can kill a whole army，it can cut men's bodies in half，it can destroy the strongest walls．It's called gunpowder，and it's easy and cheap to make．To show you how grateful I am to you，I'm offering to explain how to make it-then you will be able to destroy all your enemies！’

I was very surprised by the King's reply．

‘No！’he cried in horror．‘Don't tell me！I don't want to know how to murder people like that．I would rather give half my country away than know the secret of this powder．How can a tiny creature like you have such inhuman，cruel ideas？Never speak to me of this again！’

How strange that such an excellent king should not take the chance I was offering him！No European king would hesitate for a moment But he had other strange ideas．He believed，very simply，that every problem can be solved by honest，sen-sible people，and that the political life of a country must have no secrets and must be open for all to see and understand．Of course，we know that this is impossible，so perhaps his opinion of us is not worth considering．

■ 8 在布羅卜丁奈格的其他經歷

由於我太小，我在王宮逗留期間有好幾次危險事故。一天，葛蘭達克利赤把我放在王宮花園的草地上，自己和王后的幾個貴婦去散步了。一個園丁的小白狗出現了，它似乎對我很感興趣，它用嘴叼著我，把我叼到了它的主人那兒。幸運的是，它受到了良好的訓練，沒有試圖咬我，所以我沒有受傷。

一天王后對我說，“划船或揚帆會對你的健康有好處。你覺得怎麼樣？你願意讓我為你安排嗎？”

“夫人，”我回答說，“我願意每天划船或揚帆一會兒，可是哪兒找得到足夠小的船呢？”

“交給我吧，”她回答說，然後叫來了她的工匠，命令他們做有帆的小船。他們還做了一個木質容器，大約100米長、17米寬、3米深。這個容器盛上了水，我被小心地放進了水面上我的船裡。每天我在那兒划船或者揚帆，王后和她的貴婦在旁邊看。當然沒有風，不過這些貴婦用力吹，使船移動。

當一個貴婦抓起我往船裡放時，我幾乎再次丟了性命。她不夠小心，把我弄掉了。我驚恐萬狀，感覺自己在空中往下落。不過沒有摔到地上，我的褲子刮住了她衣服上的一個別針。我不得不呆在那兒，連一個指頭都不敢動，直到葛蘭達克利赤跑過來救我。

但是在布羅卜丁奈格的最大危險來自一隻猴子。一天葛蘭達克利赤讓我獨自留在她的房間裡，她去拜訪一些貴婦。天比較熱，窗子是開著的。我正呆在我用做臥室的盒子裡，臥室的門是敞開的。突然我聽見動物跳過窗子的聲音，我立即躲到我的盒子後面去。猴子在我看起來很大，它很快就發現了我的藏身之處。它抓起我，把我緊緊地抱著，像是抱著嬰兒。當它聽見有人打開臥室門的聲音，就立即從窗子跳出去跑上屋頂。

我想我從來沒有處於如此大的危險之中。它用三隻腿跑一隻腿抱著我，隨時都可能讓我掉下去，而我們至少離地有300米高。我可以聽見宮裡一片叫嚷聲，僕從已經明白髮生了什麼事，拿來梯子往屋頂上爬。葛蘭達克利赤在哭，數百人在花園裡看。此時，猴子正平靜地坐在屋頂，它正從它的嘴裡取出食物往我的嘴裡塞。它仍然以為我是它的嬰兒。我猜這對於下面圍觀的人來說是有趣的景觀，可是我極為害怕掉下去。

最後幾個僕人爬上了屋頂，當他們走近時，猴子放下我跑開了。我得救了，被送到了地面。此後我不得不在床上躺了兩週，直到我感覺好些，才再見人。猴子被抓住殺死了。

當我再次見到國王時，他問我這次的經歷。“你的感受是什麼，”他問，“當猴子抱著你上屋頂時？”

“先生，”我勇敢地回答說，“我很害怕，那是真的，不過下次像這樣的動物來襲擊我時，我決不會猶豫。我會像這樣拔出我的寶劍”——我向他表演我將做什麼——“將這動物傷得再也不敢靠近我！”

可是我在空中揮舞我的小劍時，國王和他的王公大聲笑了起來，我想證明我的勇敢，可是我失敗了，因為對他們來說我是個無足輕重的小動物。我後來想起這在英國也經常發生，當一個沒有家庭背景、沒有財富或沒有智力的人裝模作樣跟我們偉大的領袖一樣重要時我們也會如此嘲笑。

隨後幾周，我開始跟國王有幾次非常有趣的談話。他是一個聰明、理解力強的人。

“再告訴我一些關於你們國家的事，”一天他對我說，“我想聽聽你們的法律、你們的政治生活以及你們的風俗習慣。告訴我這些方面的全部情況，也許有些東西我們可以搬到布羅卜丁奈格來用。”

“我很高興，先生，”我驕傲地回答，“我們的國王控制著三個偉大的國家：蘇格蘭、愛爾蘭和英格蘭。我們的食物大部分自己出產，天氣既不太冷也不太熱。有兩組人制定我們的法律，其一叫做上議院，他們來自這個國家最古老最偉大的家族，其二叫做下議院，他們是這個國家最誠實、聰明而通情達理的人，是由人民自由選出來的。我們有法官決定對犯罪分子的懲罰，我們有龐大的軍隊，無敵於全世界。”

在我講的時候，國王作著筆記。我連續幾天進行解釋，我也描述了過去百來年不列顛的歷史。然後國王問了我一大堆問題。這是其中幾個。

“你們怎麼教育、訓練好家族的年青人？如果一個古老家族的最後一個兒子去世了，你們怎麼給上議院選定新的議員？這些議員真是最適合給這個國家制定法律的人嗎？在下議院中，這些人是真的誠實而聰明嗎？富人從來不用錢買路進入議院嗎？你說法律制定者不收報酬，但是你敢肯定他們從來不收受賄賂嗎？”

然後他問了一些關於我們的法庭的問題。“你們的審判為什麼那麼耗時而費錢？你們的律師和法官究竟知道多少你們的法律？他們判定正誤有多仔細？”

“為什麼，”他接著說，“你們經常打仗？或者是你們喜歡戰爭，或者是你們的鄰居很難處！究竟為什麼你們需要軍隊？如果你們是熱愛和平的人民，你們不應該害怕別的國家。而在過去的百年裡，你們除了掠奪、打仗和謀殺沒有幹別的！你們最近的歷史顯示了殘酷、嫉妒、欺詐和瘋狂的最糟糕的結果！”

我力圖儘可能滿意地回答國王，可是他並不認為我們的制度好。

“不，我的小朋友，”他和善而認真地說，“我為你感到遺憾。你向我證明了你們沒有什麼有價值的東西提供給我們。也許在過去，你們的政治生活曾經組織得恰當，可是現在很明顯，這個制度的每一部分都充滿了惰性和自私。你們的政客可以受賄賂，你們的戰士並不真的勇敢，你們的法官和律師既不通情理也不誠實，而你們的法律制定者自己知道得很少，做得更少。你一生的大多數時光都用於旅行了，我真誠地希望你比大多數英國人品行要好，不過據你所告訴我的，我擔心你的國人是地上曾經爬行過的昆蟲中最糟糕的小國民。”

我非常遺憾不得不轉述國王的這些話，我這樣做只是因為我對真相的熱愛。我必須原原本本地告訴你們發生的事，即使我並不贊同。在他發表關於我親愛的祖國的不同尋常的看法時，我不得不耐心地聽著。不過我們必須記住，這個國王生活在幾乎完全與世隔絕的國度裡，因為他不知道別的國家的制度或習俗，他的想法中有一定的狹隘性，這當然是我們歐洲人所沒有的。

你將覺得接下來發生的事很難置信。

“先生，”我說，“我想送給你一樣東西以表示感謝自我從來到宮裡後你對我的厚愛。三四百年前，我們歐洲人發明了怎樣製造一種特別的粉末。當你點燃它時，它立即燃燒爆炸，聲音比打雷還響，你可以用它來把很沉的金屬彈丸從很大的槍中射出，它可以摧毀最大的輪船，消滅整個軍隊，把人的身軀切成兩半，摧毀最堅固的牆壁。它叫火藥，製作起來簡單廉價。為了表達我是多麼的感激你，我自願給你解釋怎麼製造它——然後你就有能力消滅你的所有敵人！”

我對國王的回答感到非常吃驚。

“不！”他驚恐地叫道，“不要告訴我！我不想知道怎樣去謀殺人。我寧願割出一半國土也不想知道這種粉末的祕密。你們這樣渺小的生物怎麼可以有如此不人道、殘酷的想法？決不要再跟我提這事！”

多麼奇怪！如此優秀的國王，竟然不抓住我提供給他的機會！任何一個歐洲國王絕不會有一絲猶豫。可是他還有其他怪念頭。他相信，每個問題都可以被誠實、通情理的人解決，一個國家的政治生活必須沒有祕密，必須公開給世人看和理解。當然，我們知道這是不可能的，所以他的看法也許對我們來說不值得考慮。