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@ 50619 孝道
A: 你爸爸找到了吧？
nǐ bàba zhǎodào le ba?
Did you find your dad?
B: 謝天謝地，昨天夜裡終於找到他了。你不知道，我們全家發動，跑了大半個上海。結果還是在我家附近找到的。
xiètiānxièdì, zuótiān yèlǐ zhōngyú zhǎodào tā le. nǐ bù zhīdào, wǒmen quánjiā fādòng, pǎo le dàbàn ge Shànghǎi. jiéguǒ háishi zài wǒ jiā fùjìn zhǎodào de.
Thank heavens, we finally found him yesterday in the middle of the night. You have no idea- our entire family got mobilized, and we ran all over half of Shanghai. And in the end, he was found near our home.
A: 還好，還好。一大把年紀的人了，走丟了就糟了。幸好他沒走遠。
háihǎo, háihǎo. yīdàbǎ niánjì de rén le, zǒudiū le jiù zāo le. xìnghǎo tā méi zǒuyuǎn.
It's OK then. When an old person gets lost, it's a big mess. It's lucky he didn't roam too far.
B: 是啊，回來就好。事後我問他去哪兒了，他自己也記不清了。照這麼看，他的老年痴呆症是越來越嚴重了。
shì a, huílai jiù hǎo. shìhòu wǒ wèn tā qù nǎr5 le, tā zìjǐ yě jìbuqīng le. zhào zhème kàn, tā de lǎonián chīdāizhèng shì yuèláiyuè yánzhòng le.
Yeah. As long as he came back, it's OK. Afterward I asked him where he'd gone. He wasn't even sure himself. It looks like his Alzheimer's is getting more and more serious.
A: 哎，老人得了這種病真夠要命的。整天都要別人守著。苦了自己，也苦了子女。
āi, lǎorén dé le zhèzhǒng bìng zhēn gòu yàomìng de. zhěngtiān dōu yào biérén shǒu zhe. kǔ le zìjǐ, yě kǔ le zǐnǚ.
Agh, it's really terrible when an old person gets a disease like that. They need others to care for them all day long. They suffer, and so do their sons and daughters.
B: 誰說不是呢。我和我老婆每天一下班就往家趕，上班的時候還成天擔心他有沒有亂跑。
shéi shuō bù shì ne. wǒ hé wǒ lǎopó měitiān yī xiàbān jiù wǎng jiā gǎn, shàngbān de shíhou hái chéngtiān dānxīn tā yǒuméiyǒu luàn pǎo.
That's the truth. As soon as my wife and I get off work, we hurry right home. While we're at work, we worry all day long that he will have run off.
A: 你們不是有保姆嗎？平時讓保姆多看著點就好了。
nǐmen bù shì yǒu bǎomǔ ma? píngshí ràng bǎomǔ duō kān zhe diǎn jiù hǎo le.
Don't you have a maid? Ask the maid to check in often and you'll be fine.
B: 哪還有什麼保姆啊。來一個走一個。自從我爸得了這病以後，性格就大變，特別情緒化。正常的時候還好，發病的時候就像吃了炸藥一樣，保姆見了就怕。能有什麼辦法呢，我們又不可能辭了工作專心在家伺候他。把他一個人鎖在家裡呢，就出現了昨天那樣的事。這也不行，那也不行，我現在是一個頭兩個大啊。
nǎ hái yǒu shénme bǎomǔ a. lái yī ge zǒu yī ge. zìcóng wǒ bà dé le zhè bìng yǐhòu, xìnggé jiù dà biàn, tèbié qíngxùhuà. zhèngcháng de shíhou háihǎo, fābìng de shíhou jiùxiàng chī le zhàyào yīyàng, bǎomǔ jiàn le jiù pà. néng yǒu shénme bànfǎ ne, wǒmen yòu bù kěnéng cí le gōngzuò zhuānxīn zài jiā cìhou tā. bǎ tā yī ge rén suǒ zài jiālǐ ne, jiù chūxiàn le zuótiān nàyàng de shì. zhè yě bùxíng, nà yě bùxíng, wǒ xiànzài shì yī ge tóu liǎng ge dà a.
You must be dreaming. As soon as we get a maid, they leave. Ever since my dad got this disease, his personality has really changed. He's gotten much more emotional. It's OK when he's normal, but when the disease acts up it's like he's eaten some gun powder. Maids are afraid to see him! What can we do-- we can't quit our jobs and stay home to care for him. When we lock him into the home by himself, you get situations like we had yesterday. This doesn't work, that doesn't work. I'm at the end of my rope.
A: 是啊，不容易啊。你又是獨生子，擔子全得你一個人扛。哎，有沒有想過送養老院呢？
shì a, bù róngyì a. nǐ yòu shì dúshēngzǐ, dànzi quán děi nǐ yī ge rén káng. āi, yǒuméiyǒu xiǎng guo sòng yǎnglǎoyuàn ne?
Yeah, it's not easy. And you're an only child, so all the burden is on you. Uh, have you ever thought about putting him in an old folks' home?
B: 這怎麼行。讓我爸一個人孤苦伶仃地住在那裡，和一些不認識的人同吃同睡，而我這個做兒子的卻在家享福，這說得過去嗎？這種大逆不道的事我可做不出來。
zhè zěnme xíng. ràng wǒ bà yī ge rén gūkǔlíngdīng de zhùzài nàli, hé yīxiē bù rènshi de rén tóng chī tóng shuì, ér wǒ zhège zuò érzi de què zài jiā xiǎngfú, zhè shuō de guòqù ma? zhèzhǒng dànìbùdào de shì wǒ kě zuò bu chūlái.
How could we? How could we send my dad off to live all alone there, eating and sleeping with strangers, while his son lives happily at home? I just can't betray him that way.
A: 話也不能這麼說。給他找一個條件好的養老院，有專業人員看護，又可以和年紀差不多的人嘮嘮磕，有可能比你把他放在家裡好。
huà yě bùnéng zhème shuō. gěi tā zhǎo yī ge tiáojiàn hǎo de yǎnglǎoyuàn, yǒu zhuānyè rényuán kānhù, yòu kěyǐ hé niánjì chàbuduō de rén làolao kē, yǒu kěnéng bǐ nǐ bǎ tā fàng zài jiālǐ hǎo.
You can't say that. If you find him a good nursing home, with professional caretakers, where he can chat with people about the same age as him, it might even be better than putting him at home.
B: 這些我也都知道，可是我還是接受不了。可能是我的傳統觀念太強了。老話不是說“養兒防老”嗎？我爸辛辛苦苦把我拉扯大，容易嗎？現在老了，應該是我孝敬他的時候了。
zhèxiē wǒ yě dōu zhīdào, kěshì wǒ háishi jiēshòu buliǎo. kěnéng shì wǒ de chuántǒng guānniàn tài qiáng le. lǎohuà bù shì shuō" yǎng'érfánglǎo” ma? wǒ bà xīnxīnkǔkǔ bǎ wǒ lāche dà, róngyì ma? xiànzài lǎo le, yīnggāi shì wǒ xiàojìng tā de shíhou le.
I know all that, but I just can't accept it. Maybe my traditional views are too strong. Doesn't the old proverb go ''Raise a child to ward off old age?" My dad busted his hump to raise me. Do you think that was easy? Now that he's old, this is the time when I should be a good son for him.
A: 是啊，從小到大，就教育我們要孝順父母。所謂百善孝為先，做什麼事情都要把孝放在首位。而儒家思想中最基本的道德觀念之一就是“孝”這個字，它也在無形中左右了我們的思想。無論怎麼說，講孝道絕對是一種美德。不過你自己也別硬撐著，而且你要知道怎麼做對老人才是最好的，我們的面子不重要。
shì a, cóngxiǎodàodà, jiù jiàoyù wǒmen yào xiàoshùn fùmǔ. suǒwèi bǎi shàn xiào wéi xiān, zuò shénme shìqing dōu yào bǎ xiào fàng zài shǒuwèi. ér rújiāsīxiǎng zhōng zuì jīběn de dàodé guānniàn zhīyī jiùshì" xiào” zhège zì, tā yě zài wúxíng zhōng zuǒyòu le wǒmen de sīxiǎng. wúlùn zěnme shuō, jiǎng xiàodào juéduì shì yīzhǒng měidé. bùguò nǐ zìjǐ yě bié yìngchēng zhe, érqiě nǐ yào zhīdào zěnme zuò duì lǎorén cái shì zuìhǎo de, wǒmen de miànzi bù zhòngyào.
Yes, ever since we were very young, they've been teaching us to be good to our parents. They say that filial piety is the greatest of the virtues. Whatever you do, you should put your parents first. In Confucian thinking, the most fundamental ethical concept is filial piety. Imperceptibly, it's also affected our thinking. No matter how you slice it, being good to your parents is a cardinal virtue. But you don't need to force yourself to bear it. And you have to know what's the best way to treat old folks. Our own dignity and prestige aren't important.
B: 換成你是我，你就不會這麼想了。看到我爸那樣，我就什麼主意也沒了。你說，以前那麼精神的一個人，怎麼會變成現在這樣呢。一想到這兒，就覺得不管多難，都要自己照顧他。兒子照顧老子，天經地義。即使再累，我也要盡到做兒子的本分。
huànchéng nǐ shì wǒ, nǐ jiù bùhuì zhème xiǎng le. kàndào wǒ bà nàyàng, wǒ jiù shénme zhǔyi yě méi le. nǐ shuō, yǐqián nàme jīngshen de yī ge rén, zénme huì biànchéng xiànzài zhèyàng ne. yī xiǎngdào zhèr5, jiù juéde bùguǎn duō nán, dōu yào zìjǐ zhàogu tā. érzi zhàogu lǎozi, tiānjīngdìyì. jíshǐ zài lèi, wǒ yě yào jìndào zuò érzi de běnfèn.
If I were you, you wouldn't think that way. When I see my dad that way, I have no idea what to do. Tell me, how could a person who used to be so alert become this way? As soon as I think of it, I feel that, no matter how hard it is, I should care for him myself. Sons caring for their parents is the way things should be. No matter how exhausted I get, I have to do everything I can to be a good son.
Key Vocabulary
孝順 xiàoshùn to demonstrate filial piety
孝道 xiàodào filial obligations
老年痴呆症 lǎonián chīdāizhèng dementia in old age
一個頭兩個大 yī ge tóu liǎng ge dà difficult to solve (of a problem)
孤苦伶仃 gūkǔlíngdīng orphaned and alone
享福 xiǎngfú to enjoy the good life
大逆不道 dànìbùdào sedition
嘮磕 làokē to chat
拉扯大 lāche dà to raise (a child)
養兒防老 yǎng'érfǎnglǎo to raise children in order to provide for oneself in old age
百善孝為先 bǎi shàn xiào wéi xiān filial piety is the virtue of prime importance
左右 zuǒyòu to control
天經地義 tiānjīngdìyì entirely justified
本分 běnfèn duty
Supplementary Vocabulary
贍養 shànyǎng to support
報答 bàodá to repay
天倫之樂 tiānlúnzhīlè familial happiness
養育之恩 yǎngyùzhī'ēn gratitude for one's upbringing
安享晚年 ānxiǎng wǎnnián to live in comfort
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