# ■ 7 Return to Toad Hall

The Rat got hold of Toad's neck, pulled him out of the water, and took him into his hall.

Oh Ratty! ' cried Toad. 'I've done so many wonderful things since I last saw you! The dangers that I've been in! I was put in prison-escaped, of course! Pushed into a canal-swam safely away! Stole a horse- sold it for a lot of money! Oh, I am a clever Toad, and—'

Toad, ' said the Water Rat, very seriously, 'stop boasting! Go, upstairs at once, wash yourself, and put on some of my clothes. I've never seen anything as wet and dirty as you are. '

Toad went upstairs a little crossly, but he was pleased to get out of the washerwoman's dress. He came down very clean and tidy, and ready to tell the Rat all about his adventures- how clever, how brave, how successful he had been. The Rat gave him lunch, and listened, unsmiling, while Toad talked and talked and talked. When at last he finished, the Rat looked up.

I have to tell you, Toad, ' he said slowly, 'that I feel ashamed— yes, ashamed, to have a criminal, an escaped prisoner, for my friend. Can' t you see that none of this is exciting or amusing? '

There was a little silence. Then Toad said sadly, 'You' re right, Ratty. Of course you are. How silly and boastful I have been! I shall become a quiet, sensible Toad from now on. In a while I'll walk down to Toad Hall and—'

‘Walk down to Toad Hall?' cried the Rat. 'What are you talking about? Haven't you heard ?'

Heard what?' said Toad, looking frightened. 'Quick, Ratty, tell me! What haven't I heard?'

About the Wild Wooders! ' cried the Rat. 'The Stoats and the Weasels and the Ferrets- they've taken Toad Hall! When you were sent to prison, they came out of the Wild Wood one dark night and broke into the Hall. They've been living there ever since— eating your food, drinking your drink, giving wild parties. They've got guns and knives and sticks, and they keep guards round the house night and day. They say they' re going to stay there for ever. '

At first Toad couldn't believe it. But he had gone up to Toad Hall, and two ferrets in the garden had laughed at him, and the stoats who were guarding the walls had shot at him. Toad dropped flat in the road and the bullet passed over his head. He went back, very unhappy, to the Water Rat.

That night there was a meeting in the Rat's house. The Mole and the Badger came, to talk about plans to take back Toad Hall from the Wild Wooders.

When they came in and saw Toad, the Badger shook his head sadly. ' Poor Toad! This is not a happy home-coming for you.

But the Mole was very pleased to see him. 'Here's old Toad! ' he cried. 'How did you manage to escape from prison?It was very clever of you to do that. '

Clever?' said Toad. 'Well, I don't want to boast, Mole. I'll tell you all about it and you can decide if一 ‘Toad, do he quiet, please! ' said the Rat. 'We need to discuss plans. I think I know the best way for Toad to—'

No, you don't! ' said the Mole. 'I know what Toad should do. He should—'

Well, I'm not going to! ' cried Toad, getting excited. 'I'm not taking orders from you fellows! It's my house that we're talking about and—'

By now they were almost shouting at each other, when suddenly a deep low voice came from an armchair.

Be quiet at once, all of you! ' said the Badger. 'And listen. The Mole and I have been watching Toad Hall. The stoats, with their guns, are on guard all round the walls, and they're very good guards too. We can't attack the place from outside. They're too strong for us. '

Then there's no hope, ' cried Toad miserably. 'I shall go and join the army or something, and never see my dear Toad Hall again! '

Cheer up, Toady, ' said the Badger, 'because now I'm going to tell you a very great secret. '

Toad sat up, interested. He loved secrets, although he could never keep them.

There- is- an -underground- tunnel, ' said the Badger slowly, 'which goes from the river bank near here, right up into the middle of Toad Hall. '

Don't be silly, Badger! cried Toad. ' Of course there isn't! I know Toad Hall, inside and outside, and—'

My young friend, ' said the Badger calmly, ' your father—who was a great friend of mine— told me many things that he didn't tell you. “ Don't tell my son about this tunnel, ” he said to me. “ He's a good boy, but he talks far too much. ”'

Toad opened his mouth to argue, and then decided not to.

I asked Otter, ' continued the Badger, ' to do some spy work for us. He pretended to be a gardener and went to the back door of the Hall, asking for work. During the conversation he learnt that tomorrow night there will be a big birthday par-ty— the Chief Weasel's, I think— in the dining-hall. All the weasels will be there, eating and drinking and laughing, and making a lot of noise. '

But the stoats will still be on guard on the walls, ' said the Rat.

True, 'agreed the Badger. 'But the weasels, you see, know that, so they won't have any guns or sticks with them at the party. And the tunnel comes up into that little room right next to the dining-hall. We only have to—'

—run into the dining-hall—' cried the Mole.

—with our guns and sticks and knives —'shouted the Rat.

—and chase them and beat them and hit them! 'cried the Toad, greatly excited. He ran round and round the room, jumping over the chairs.

‘ Very well, then, ' said the Badger, sitting back comfortably and opening his newspaper. 'That is the plan, and there's nothing more for you to argue about. '

All the next day the Rat hurried about, getting the guns and the knives and the sticks ready. Once the Badger lifted his head from the newspaper.

We shan't need guns or knives, Ratty, 'he said. 'We four, with our sticks, will clear the dining-hall in five minutes. I could do it by myself. '

Better to be safe than sorry, ' said the Rat.

At last the evening came, and the four friends went quietly along the river bank to find the entrance to the secret tunnel. Toad, of course, managed to fall in the river and his friends had to pull him out. The tunnel was cold, and wet, and dark, and narrow. Poor Toad got frightened and ran into the Rat by mistake, who then nearly knocked the Mole over. All this made a lot of noise, and the Badger, who was in front with the lantern, turned round.

If Toad can't keep quiet, ' he whispered angrily, 'I'll leave him here alone in the dark! '

After that, the Toad kept very quiet.

They could hear the noise of the party while they were still underground. Silently, they pushed open the door in the roof of the tunnel, and climbed up into the small room next to the dining-hall. Now they could hear one of the weasels singing a very rude song about Toad the car-thief.

Just wait until I get my hands on him! ' Toad whispered angrily, showing his teeth.

Right, boys! ' said the Badger, looking round at his friends. ' The hour has come! Follow me! '

And they crashed through the door into the dining-hall.

What a battle it was! How the four friends roared as they ran through the hall! What screams of fear came from the surprised weasels and ferrets! Tables and chairs were knocked over, plates and glasses went crashing to the floor. Up and down went the four friends, shouting and roaring, and their sticks whistled through the air. There were only four of them, but they seemed enormous to the weasels and the ferrets. The Wild Wooders ran in terror, escaping through the doors and windows, and even up the chimneys—anywhere to get away from those terrible sticks.

In five minutes the room was cleared. The stoats outside, the four friends discovered later, had gone too. They were already frightened by the noise of battle from the hall, so when the weasels and the ferrets started running out in terror, the stoats dropped their guns and ran back to the Wild Wood. In fact, after that night there was no more trouble from the Wild Wooders for a long time. And when any of them met the Badger and his friends out for a walk, they were very polite indeed.

Back in Toad Hall, there was a lot of tidying up to do after the battle. At last it was all done, and the four friends, tired but happy, went upstairs to bed.

And now, ' said the Badger, after breakfast the next morning, 'we must have a Victory Party. Toad, you must write and invite all our friends for tonight. '

What—me do all the work?' said Toad crossly, 'Why…'He suddenly stopped, then said, ' Yes, of course. I'll do every-thing. I'll plan the party, and the singing and—'

Oh no, ' said the Rat, 'You're not going to sing any of your songs. '

Not just one little song?' asked Toad miserably.

No, Toady. You know very well that your songs are all about you and how clever you are. They're just one long boast! '

Come on now, Toad, ' said the Badger kindly. 'You know that you have to change your ways and become a sensible animal. Why not begin now? What better moment could there be, on your return to Toad Hall?'

Toad looked at his three friends' serious faces. For a long while he seemed to be thinking deeply. At last he spoke. 'My friends, you are right, ' he said sadly. 'And I am wrong. From today, I will be a very different Toad. You will never be ashamed of me again. '

The party was a great success. Everyone wanted to hear about the battle, and there was a lot of noisy talking and laughing. But Toad was not at all noisy. He moved quietly round the room, making sure that everyone had enough to eat and drink. He said very little about the battle, only, 'Oh, it was Badger's clever plan. And the Mole and the Rat did all the hard fighting.

His three friends watched him with their mouths open in surprise-which pleased Toad very much. Towards the end of the evening, some of the younger animals started banging on the table and shouting, ' Toad! Song! Mr Toad' s Song! ' But Toad only shook his head gently, and immediately began a quiet conversation with Otter, asking in an interested voice about his children.

He was indeed a different Toad!

■ 7．重返蛤蟆宅第

水鼠抓住癩蛤蟆的脖子將他拉出水面，然後把他帶回客廳。

“噢，阿鼠！”癩蛤蟆叫道，“最後那次見你之後，我做了好多了不起的事！險情層出不窮！我被投入監獄——逃出來了，當然！被推進了運河——安全游上了岸！偷了一匹馬——賣了好多錢！噢，我真是聰明的癩蛤蟆，而且——”

“癩蛤蟆，”水鼠很嚴肅地打斷道，“不要再吹牛了！快上樓，洗洗乾淨換上我的衣服。我從來沒見過誰像你這樣又溼又髒的。”

癩蛤蟆有點溫怒地上樓了，但是他還是很樂意脫掉這身洗衣婆的裝扮。他一身整潔乾淨地下樓了，準備告訴水鼠他的冒險經歷——他是多麼聰明，多麼勇敢，多麼成功。水鼠給他取來午餐，不苟言笑地聽癩蛤蟆在那兒滔滔不絕。最後癩蛤蟆結束了，水鼠抬頭看著他。

“我得告訴你，癩蛤蟆，”他慢慢地說著，“我感到羞恥——是的，羞恥有一位朋友是犯人，一位逃出來的犯人。難道你看不出這一切一點也不有趣，一點也不令人興奮嗎？”

一陣沉默，然後癩蛤蟆難過地說：“你是對的，阿鼠。當然，你對。我太愚蠢，太好吹牛了！從現在起，我應該做一個安靜，理智的癩蛤蟆。過一會我就回蛤蟆宅第，然後——”

“回蛤蟆宅第？”水鼠叫道，“你在說什麼呀？難道你沒聽說？”

“聽說什麼？”癩蛤蟆問道，一副驚恐的樣子，“快，阿鼠，告訴我！什麼我沒聽說？”

“關於野樹林的動物！”水鼠叫道。“大白鼬，黃鼠狼和雪貂——他們佔據了蛤蟆宅第！當你被送進監獄，他們在一個漆黑的晚上走出野樹林，闖進了你的宅第。從此他們就住在那兒了——吃你的，喝你的，開狂歡晚會。他們有刀，有槍，有棍棒，日夜都有衛士把守在房子周圍。他們說他們將永遠住下去。”

剛開始癩蛤蟆怎麼也不能相信這件事。他還是去了蛤蟆宅第，只見兩隻雪貂站在花園裡嘲笑著他，守衛在牆頭上的大白鼬向他開槍射擊。癩蛤蟆急忙趴在地上，子彈從他頭上飛過。他非常沮喪地回到了水鼠家。

那天晚上在水鼠家裡有個會。鼴鼠和獾要來一起商量怎麼從野樹林動物手中奪回蛤蟆宅第。

當他們走進房子看見癩蛤蟆時，獾很遺憾地搖著頭說：“可憐的蛤蟆！對你來說，這不是一次愉快的回家之行。”

當鼴鼠見到他顯得非常高興。“你這個老蛤蟆！”他叫道，“你是怎麼設法從監獄裡逃出來的？你真是聰明。”

“聰明？”癩蛤蟆說，“得了，我不想吹牛了，鼴鼠。我將告訴你所有的一切，然後你會決定我是否——”

“癩蛤蟆，請你務必保持安靜！”水鼠說道，“我們必須研究些方案。我想我知道癩蛤蟆應採取的最好方法——”

“不，你不知道！”鼴鼠打斷道。“我知道癩蛤蟆應怎麼做，他應該——”

“夠了，我什麼都不想做！”癩蛤蟆叫道，他有些激動。“我不會聽從你們這幫傢伙的命令！我們現在談論的是我的房子，而且

這時，他們幾乎是在互相大叫大嚷了，突然從手扶椅那兒傳來一個低沉的聲音。

“你們全給我馬上安靜下來！”獾說道。“聽著，鼴鼠和我一直在注意著蛤蟆宅第的動向。持槍的大白鼬把守在圍牆周圍，他們還都是很不賴的衛兵。我們是不能從外面攻打進去的。對於我們來說，他們太厲害了。”

“那麼沒有希望了，”癩蛤蟆痛苦地叫道。“我將離開這兒去參軍或幹別的什麼，我將再也見不到我心愛的宅第了！”

“振作起來，阿癩，”獾說，“因為我將告訴你一個非常重大的祕密。”

蛤蟆很有興趣地坐直了身。他喜歡祕密，儘管他從來不能保守祕密。

“有-個-地-下-通-道，”獾緩緩地說，“從附近的河岸剛好通到蛤蟆宅第的中部。”

“別荒唐了，獾！”癩蛤蟆叫了起來。“當然沒有！我熟悉蛤蟆宅第的裡裡外外，而且——”

“我的年輕朋友，”獾平靜地說，“你父親——我最好的朋友——告訴過我許多沒對你提過的事情。‘不要把這個通道告訴我兒子，’他對我說，‘他是好孩子，但他話太多。’”

癩蛤蟆張大嘴巴準備爭辯，馬上又決定放棄了。

“我讓水獺，”獾繼續道。“為我們作了些偵察。他扮成園丁去宅子後門找活幹。在交談中，他瞭解到明天晚上那兒將舉行大型的生日晚會——我想是黃鼠狼頭頭的——在餐廳裡。所有的黃鼠狼將在那兒吃喝玩樂，並製造出許多噪聲。”

“但是大白鼬肯定還會在牆頭上巡邏，”水鼠說道。

“是的，”獾贊同道，“但是你要明白，正是因為黃鼠狼知道有人放哨，他們在舞會上就不會隨身帶槍棍之類的。而地道剛好通到餐廳隔壁的那所小房間，我們只要——”

“——衝進廳——”鼴鼠叫道。

“——帶著我們的槍、棍和刀——”水鼠喊道。

“——然後趕他們，揍他們，砍他們！”蛤蟆也叫了起來，他異常激動，跨過椅子，在房間裡跑圈兒。

“很好，那麼，”獾舒服地向後靠坐著，打開報紙。“這就是計劃，你們沒有什麼再爭吵了吧。”

第二天一整天，水鼠忙上忙下，準備著槍、刀和棍棒。一次，獾從報紙上抬起頭，說：“我們不需要刀槍，阿鼠。我們四個帶著棍棒在五分鐘內就可以清理好餐廳，其實我一個就能解決。”

“最好能萬無一失，免得有遺憾，”水鼠答道。

夜幕終於降臨了，這四個朋友悄悄地沿著河岸找到了祕密通道的入口。癩蛤蟆竟然掉到了河裡，這也是情理中的事，他的朋友不得不將他拉了上來。地道里又冷又溼，既黑也窄。可憐的癩蛤蟆害怕極了，不小心撞倒了水鼠，水鼠又差點碰倒了鼴鼠。這不免弄出了很多響聲，獾提著燈籠走在前面，這時轉過頭。

“如果蛤蟆不能保持鎮定，”他壓低聲音生氣地說，“我就把他獨個兒留在黑暗裡！”

此後，癩蛤蟆就一直特別安靜。

他們在宅第的地下就能聽到晚會的喧鬧聲。悄悄地，他們推開了地道頂上的門，然後爬進餐廳隔壁的那間小房子。現在他們可以聽見一隻黃鼠狼正唱著一首相當粗俗的歌，什麼癩蛤蟆這個盜車賊如何如何。

“待會兒我要掐住他的脖子！”癩蛤蟆吡牙咧嘴，憤憤地低聲說道。

“好了，小夥子們！”獾看著他的朋友們說。“時候到了！跟我來！”

緊接著，他們撞開門衝進飯廳。

那是一場怎樣的戰鬥啊！這四個朋友是怎樣地怒吼著衝進了大廳！吃驚的黃鼠狼和雪貂發出了怎樣的尖叫聲！桌子和椅子給撞倒了，杯子和盤子摔碎在地板上。這四個朋友橫衝直闖，怒吼狂叫著，他們的棍棒在空中發出嘶嘶揮舞聲。他們僅有四位，但在黃鼠狼，雪貂眼裡他們似乎非常強大。這些野樹林動物嚇得到處跑，從門那兒，從窗戶那兒，有的甚至從煙囪那兒——任何能躲開那些可怕的棍子的地方。

五分鐘內房間就被清除乾淨。這四個夥伴後來才發現外面的大白鼬也不見了。其實，大廳裡的戰鬥聲把他們給嚇倒了，於是當黃鼠狼和雪貂在驚恐中亂竄時，他們也扔下槍逃回野樹林。事實上，自那晚後的很長時間裡，野樹林的動物沒再來找過麻煩。而且當他們中的任何一位遇見獾和他的朋友在外面散步，他們顯得的確非常有禮貌。

會戰後的蛤蟆宅第有許多清掃工作要做。最後收拾妥當，這四個夥伴雖累但很開心地上樓睡覺了。

“現在，”第二天早餐後，獾開口道，“我們應該舉行一個慶功宴會。癩蛤蟆，你應該寫些請柬邀請我們所有的朋友今晚來這兒。”

“什麼——我幹這所有的活？”癩蛤蟆生氣地說，“為什麼……”他突然停下來，然後說道：“是的，當然。我將照辦，安排一個派對，又唱又——”

“噢，不，”水鼠打斷道，“你不要再唱你的那些歌了。”

“一首都不行嗎？”癩蛤蟆傷心地問道。

“不行，阿癩。你很瞭解你的歌全是關於你自己，還有你是多麼聰明之類的。那僅僅是些冗長的吹牛皮罷了！”

“好了，蛤蟆，”獾和善地說。“你知道你得改變你的行事方式，成為一隻理智的動物。為什麼不從現在開始呢？如今你重新返回蛤蟆宅第，還有比現在更好的時刻嗎？”

癩蛤蟆看著三位朋友嚴肅的表情，很長時間，他似乎沉浸在思考中。最後他開口了。“我的朋友，你們是對的，”他難過地說道，“我錯了，從今天開始，我將洗心革面，你們將不再會為我感到羞恥了。”

晚會非常成功。每個人都想聽聽那次襲擊，大家在那兒說著，笑著，吵吵嚷嚷的。但是癩蛤蟆一點也不吵。他在房間裡靜靜地轉悠著，保證大家都有足夠的食品和飲料。關於那次戰鬥，他只談了一點點：“哦，那是獾的妙計，鼴鼠和水鼠的英勇作戰。”

他的三位朋友張大嘴巴吃驚地看著他——這讓癩蛤蟆非常開心。晚宴臨近尾聲時，一些年輕的動物開始敲著桌子叫著：“蛤蟆！唱歌！唱首蛤蟆先生的歌！”但是癩蛤蟆只是輕輕地搖了搖頭，很快又轉過去靜靜地和水獺聊天，還很感興趣地問著他孩子們的情況。

他確實是改變了！