# ■ 24 Returning to Thornfield

In the morning I explained to Diana and Mary that I had to go on a journey， and would be away for several days． Although they did not know the reason for my journey，they were far too sensitive to my feelings to bother me with questions．

And so I walked to Whitcross，the lonely crossroads on the moor，where I had arrived a year ago with no money or luggage．I took the coach， and after thirty－six hours of travelling I got down at Thornfield village， and almost ran across the fields in my hurry to see the well－known house again，and its owner．I decided to approach from the front， to get the best view of the house． From there I would be able to see my master's window．'He might even be walking in the gardens，'I thought，'and I could run to him，touch him！Surely that wouldn't hurt anybody？'

But when I reached the great stone columns of the main gate，I stood still in horror． There， where I had hoped to see a fine， impressive house， was nothing but a blackened heap of stones，with the silence of death about it．No wonder that letters addressed to people here had never received an answer．There must have been a great fire．How had it started？Had any lives been lost？ I ran back to the village to find answers to my questions．

Well，ma'am，'the hotel－owner told me，'I was one of Mr Rochester's servants at the time， and I can tell you it was his mad wife who started the fire in the governess's room． The master had been wildly in love with the governess， you see，ma'am， although she was just a plain little thing， and when she disappeared， he almost went mad． His wife must have understood enough to be jealous of the girl．Anyway，in the fire the master risked his life helping all the servants out of the house， then bravely went back to save the mad woman． We saw her jump from the roof and fall to her death． But because he went back to help her，he was badly injured in the fire，losing a hand and the sight of both eyes．Very sad， ma'am．'

Where is he now？'I asked urgently．

At another house of his， Ferndean Manor， thirty miles away．

I hired a carriage to drive there at once．

■ 24 回到特恩費得

早晨，我跟戴安娜和瑪麗解釋說我必須出門，離開幾天。儘管她們不知道我出門的原因，但她們都小心地顧及著我的感覺，沒有多問什麼。

於是我走到威特考斯。一年前，我曾身無分文來到這塊沼澤地上的十字路口。我乘上馬車，經過36個小時的旅程，在特恩費得村下了車。我幾乎是跑著走過田野，急切地想再次看到那熟悉的老屋和它的主人。我決定從前面過去，以便看得更清楚些。從這個角度我能見到主人房間的窗戶。“他或許就在花園散步呢！”我想。“我可以向他跑過去，撫摸他！這肯定不會傷了誰吧？”

但是，當我來到大門的巨大石柱下時，我呆站著，心中充滿恐懼。我原本希望看到一座府第巍然矗立的地方，此時卻只剩下幾堆焦黑的石頭，周圍是死一般的寂靜。難怪寫給這裡的人的信，沒有一點兒迴音呢。一定是發生了大火災，怎麼引起的呢？有人死去嗎？我跑回村子去尋找答案。

“是這樣，女士。”旅館的店主對我說。“我曾是羅切斯特先生的一個僕人，我可以告訴你，一定是他的瘋老婆在家庭教師的房間裡放了火。女士，你知道，儘管她只是個不起眼的小東西，可是主人卻瘋狂地愛上了她。她失蹤後，他幾乎要瘋了。他的老婆一定還知道嫉妒那個姑娘。不管怎樣，大火中主人冒著生命危險幫助所有的僕人們逃出了屋子，然後又勇敢地衝回去救那瘋女人。我們看到她從屋頂跳下來，摔死了。可是他因為回去救她卻被大火嚴重燒傷，失去了一隻手，一雙眼睛也瞎了。真讓人傷心啊，女士。”

“他現在在哪兒？”我急切地問。

“在他的另一所房子楓丹莊園那兒，離這兒30英里。”

我立即租了輛馬車，向那裡駛去。