# ■ 1 Coming to England

My name is Carol Sanders．

I live in England now，but when I was younger，I lived in Hong Kong．My father was a businessman there and my mother worked as a secretary．We lived in Hong Kong for seven years．

I was happy at school， with lots of friends，and we had a good time．I liked pop music—the Rolling Stones，David Bowie and Jake Rosso were my favourites．

Jake Rosso was my favourite singer． He died in a car accident the year I left school， but I listened to his pop records all the time．I had hundreds of pictures and photos of him on my bedroom wall．

Then one day in winter when I was seventeen，things began to go wrong for me．

My father went to Australia on business．I loved him very much and didn't like him going away．

‘Come home quickly，’I always said to him．

He was in Australia for two weeks．Then， on the day of his journey home， an aeroplane from Sydney crashed into the sea just south of Hong Kong．Everybody on the plane died．

I heard about the plane crash on television．At first， I did not think about my father．Then I remembered he was flying back from Sydney on that day．

‘Oh，no！’I cried．

I telephoned the airport but they did not know the names of all the passengers then．

‘Perhaps my father didn't get that plane，’I thought．‘ Oh，please！Please！’

My mother was at work and I called her on the telephone．She came home quickly and we went to the airport and waited for news．

Later，we learned my father was on the plane．

‘It's not true！’I shouted．

But it was true， and I began to cry．

I cried for weeks and weeks．I spent many days alone in my room．I was lonely and sad and I wanted to die，too．

I stopped going out with my friends． I didn't want to see other people．I stopped listening to Jake Rosso's records， and took his pictures off my bedroom wall． I didn't listen to music or watch television． Nothing mattered any more．

Then I stopped crying．I stopped feeling sad and began to feel angry．

‘Why did it happen to him？’I asked my mother．‘Why do the best people die？Jake Rosso．My father．’

‘I… I don't know， Carol，'my mother said．She was unhappy，too．

At the time of the plane crash， I was a student at college．I enjoyed the college work and life very much， but after my father's death I stopped doing my work at the college．I began to go out with some new friends．They were different from my other friends，and my mother didn't like them．

‘ They're bad people，Carol，'she told me．‘They do dangerous things．’

‘They're exciting，’I said．‘And I like them．’

I knew she was angry but I didn't care． But then I learned my new friends took drugs，and I began to take drugs，too．It was wrong and stupid，I know that now， but I was unhappy and angry．

The police came to the college to arrest some of the students．They didn't arrest me， but I had to leave the college．It was a bad time．

My mother was very unhappy with me．‘What am I going to do with you，Carol？ she said．

‘I'm sorry，’I told her．

‘We'll go back to England，'she said．‘You can find a college there．Perhaps you can be happier in England．’

‘All right，’I said．‘I want to forget what's happened．I want to forget what I've done and begin a new life， be a new person．’

A month later， we came back to England．We lived in London，in a hotel．It was strange，at first， with all the red buses and everybody speaking English．It was the beginning of the summer，three months before college began in the autumn．London was full of tourists．

We looked at all the famous buildings—Buckingham Palace，the Tower of London．And we went to restaurants and theatres in the evenings．It was interesting and exciting and I began to forget the bad times in Hong Kong．

‘I'm pleased we came to London，’I told my mother．

But after a few weeks，she said，‘You need to find a college，Carol．You must go on studying． And I need a job．’

That evening， we looked in the newspapers．

‘What about this？’I said．I showed my mother a job in the newspaper．

SECRETARY

for the summer months

on a small private island in Scotland．

Live with the family in a big house．

interseting work and good pay

for the right person．

Phone Greta Poss．Telephone number 071…

‘Well， that sounds interesting，'said my mother．‘I'd like to work as a secretary on an island in Scotland．It's a beautiful country， Carol， and you can go to a college there in the autumn．’

‘And it's a place to live for the summer，’I said．‘Hotels are expensive．’

My mother telephoned Greta Ross．

Come and see me tomorrow， Greta Ross told her．‘Come to Savoy Hotel at eleven o'clock．’

I went to Savoy Hotel with my mother．It was big and ex pensive，bigger than our hotel，and in the centre of London．

‘Mum needs this job，I thought．‘And a private island in Scotland is a nice place to live．Perhaps I can forget what's happened if I go there．’

‘Room twenty－two，'said the woman at the hotel desk．‘Go on up． Mrs Ross will see you now．’

Greta Ross was waiting for us．She was about thirty years old and very beautiful．She wore an expensive red dress and her hair was very long and dark．

‘This is my daughter，Carol，'said my mother．

‘Hallo， Carol，'said Greta Ross．

‘Hallo，’I said．

‘Carol is eighteen years old，'said my mother．‘Can she come with me，if I get the job？ Perhaps she can help in the house or in the garden．She likes gardening．She's studying farming at college．’

‘Perhaps， said Greta Ross．‘There's a small farm on the island．’

‘I'd like to work on the farm，’I said．

Greta Ross looked at my mother．‘How long did you live in Hong Kong，Mrs Sanders？’

‘Seven years，’answered my mother．‘My husband died in a plane crash last year，so we've come back to live in England．’

‘Where did you live before Hong Kong？’

‘We lived in India for three years．’

Then Greta Ross took my mother into a room and asked her more questions．I waited outside．

‘Greta Ross is nice，’I thought．‘I hope my mother gets the job．’

Soon after，the door opened and my mother came out．She was smiling．

Greta Ross said，‘Please wait here for a minute，Mrs Sanders．I want to make a phone call．'she went back into the room，and closed the door．

I was sitting on a chair near the door，and I could just hear Greta Ross's voice speaking on the phone．

‘I think I've found someone，'she was saying．‘She has a daughter，but the girl can work in the garden or on the farm… Don't worry，they've been away from England for ten years… It'll be all right，I tell you… Don't worry．’

After a few minutes， Greta Ross put down the phone and came ont of the room．

‘You've got the job，'she told my mother．

My mother was pleased．‘Thank you，'she replied．

I was pleased，too， but now I was worried about that phone call．I didn't understand it．

■ 1 來到英格蘭

我叫卡羅爾·桑德斯。

我現居英格蘭，但我更年輕時住在香港。我父親在那兒經商而我母親是個祕書。我們在香港住了七年。

我在學校很快樂，有許多朋友；我們玩得很愉快。我喜歡流行音樂——滾石樂隊、戴維·鮑伊和傑克·羅素是我至愛。

傑克·羅索是我最喜歡的歌手。我離校那年他死於一次車禍，但我一直在聽他的流行歌曲唱片。我在我臥室的牆上貼了成百上千的有關他的畫片和照片。

接著在我17歲那年冬季的一天，事情對我來說開始變糟了。

我父親去澳大利亞出差。我非常愛他，不願意讓他離家在外。

“快點回家來，”我總是對他說。

他在澳大利亞呆了兩週。接著，在他要登上回程的那天，一架從悉尼起飛的飛機墜入香港正南部的海域。機上人員全部遇難。

我從電視上聽到飛機失事的消息。起初，我並沒有想到我父親。後來，我想起來那天他正從悉尼乘機返回。

“啊，不！”我叫了起來。

我給機場打電話，但他們那時還不知道所有乘客的名字。

“或許我父親沒乘那架飛機。”我想，“啊，千萬別乘！千萬別乘那架飛機！”

我母親當時正在上班，於是我給她打了電話。她很快回家；我們去機場並等待消息。

後來，我們得知我父親正在那架飛機上。

“這不是真的！”我喊道。

但這是真的，我哭了起來。

我哭了一週又一週。好多天我獨自一人呆在房間裡。我既孤獨又傷心，我也想過去死。

我不再和朋友們出去玩了。我不想見別人。我不再聽傑克·羅索的唱片了，還把他的圖片從我臥室的牆上取了下來。我不聽音樂了，也不看電視了。一切對我都不再要緊了。

後來我不哭了。我不再傷心了，而開始感到憤怒了。

“為什麼這事讓他碰上了呢？”我問媽媽，“為什麼總是最好的人死呢？傑克·羅索。我爸爸。”

“我……我不知道，卡羅爾。”我媽媽說。她也不愉快。

飛機失事的時候，我正是個大學學生。我當時很喜歡大學的學習和生活，但我父親去世後我在大學不學習了。我開始和一些新結識的朋友出去玩。他們和我的其他朋友不一樣，而且我媽媽不喜歡他們。

“他們不是正經人，卡羅爾。”她告訴我，“他們在幹一些危險的事情。”

“他們令人感到興奮。”我說，“而且我喜歡他們。”

我知道她生氣了，可我不在乎。後來我得知我新結識的朋友們在吸毒，我也開始吸毒了。我現在知道那樣做既錯又蠢，可那時候我心情鬱悶。

警察來到大學抓了一些學生。他們沒抓我，可我不得不離開那個大學。那段日子可真糟糕。

我媽媽對我很不高興。“我拿你可怎麼辦呢，卡羅爾？”她說。

“對不起，”我告訴她說。

“我們回英格蘭吧。”她說，“在那兒你可以找所大學上。在英格蘭也許你會高興些。”

“好吧。”我說，“我想把過去發生的事忘掉。我想把我所幹的事忘掉，開始新生活，成為一個新人。”

一個月後，我們回到了英格蘭。我們住在倫敦，呆在一家飯店裡。起初，一切都很新奇：公共汽車是紅色的，人人都說英語。時值初夏，離秋季開學還有三個月。倫敦到處都是觀光客。

我們參觀了所有著名的建築物——白金漢宮、倫敦塔。而且晚上我們去餐館和劇院。這令人感興趣、令人激動，我開始忘掉在香港的那些令人難受的時光。

“我真為我們來到了倫敦而高興，”我對媽媽說。

但是過了幾周之後，她說：“你得找所大學上，卡羅爾。你必須繼續你的學業。我也需要個工作。”

那天傍晚，我們翻看了一下報紙。

“這工作怎麼樣？”我說。我給媽媽看了看報上登的一條招工的消息。

招聘祕書啟事

蘇格蘭一私人小島上

夏季招聘祕書一名。

可與本家共享寬裕住所。

若人選合適，

工作有趣，薪金豐厚。

有意者請與格里塔·羅斯聯繫。電話：071……

“嗯，聽起來挺有意思的。”我媽媽說，“我願意在蘇格蘭的一個島上幹祕書工作。它是個很美麗的地方，卡羅爾，而且你秋季可以在那兒上大學。”

“夏季也可以在那兒過。”我說，“飯店很費錢。”

我媽媽打電話給格里塔·羅斯。

“明天來見我吧。”格里塔·羅斯告訴她，“11點請到薩沃伊飯店來。”

我和媽媽一起去了薩沃伊飯店。這個飯店既大又貴，比我們住的飯店大，並位於倫敦的中心地帶。

“媽媽需要這個工作。”我想，“蘇格蘭的一座私人島嶼還是個生活的好地方。我如果去那兒，也許就可以把過去發生的事情忘掉。”

“22號房間。”飯店服務檯的女士說，“上樓去吧。羅斯夫人現在就可以接見您。”

格里塔·羅斯正等著我們。她大約三十歲，很漂亮。她穿著一件很貴的紅色連衣裙，頭髮很長很黑。

“這是我女兒卡羅爾，”我媽媽說。

“你好，卡羅爾。”格里塔·羅斯說。

“您好，”我說。

“卡羅爾18歲了。”我媽媽說，“如果我能得到這份工作，她可以跟著我嗎？也許她能幫助做些家務活或幹些園子裡的活。她喜歡園藝。她正在大學學農業。”

“也許行吧。”格里塔·羅斯說，“島上有個小農場。”

“我喜歡在農場裡幹活，”我說。

格里塔·羅斯看了看我母親。“你們在香港住了多久，桑德斯夫人？”

“七年。”我媽媽說，“我丈夫去年因飛機失事去世了，所以我們回英格蘭住來了。”

“住在香港之前你們呆在哪兒？”

“我們在印度住了三年。”

然後格里塔·羅斯帶我媽媽進了一個房間，問了她更多的問題。我在外邊等著。

“格里塔·羅斯挺好的。”我想，“我希望媽媽能得到這份工作。”

過了不一會兒門開了，我媽媽出來了。她微笑著。

格里塔·羅斯說：“請在這兒等一會兒，桑德斯夫人。我想去打個電話。”她返回房間，並關上了門。

我坐在門旁的一把椅子上，正好能聽到格里塔·羅斯打電話的聲音。

“我想我已經找到了一個人。”她正在說，“她有個女兒，但這個女孩可以在園子或在農場幹些活兒……別擔心，她們離開英格蘭已有10年了……不會出事的，我告訴你……別擔心。”

過了一會兒，格里塔·羅斯掛上了電話並從屋裡出來了。

“你得到了這份工作，”她告訴我媽媽說。

我媽媽很高興。“謝謝您，”她說。

我也很高興，可現在我對那個電話感到憂慮不安。我不明白它的意思。